#isms

It’s my birthday today, so to celebrate, here are my most recent #isms from my children.

The Artist: “My friends had to leave and can’t play with me anymore.”
Me: “I literally made you a friend. It’s your sister. She’s your lifelong friend.”
The Artist: “She’s just an experiment.”
Me: “She is not an experiment!!”

The Artist: “I need my vitamin.”
Me: “I gave it to you this morning.”
The Artist: “Are you sure?”
Me: “Yes.”
The Artist: “Hold on, I’m going to check with God.” (Holds up an imaginary phone.) “Hello, God? Is Mommy telling the truth? Okay, thanks.” (Hangs up imaginary phone.) “He said no.”

Kyle: “I’m ready to go to bed.”
The Engineer: “Me, too.”

(to a dog chasing us in the neighborhood while we were riding in a golf cart)
The Artist: “You don’t want to mess with us!”

The Artist: “I can count to 10 in Spanish. Uno, dos….Corinthians…”

The Artist: “Am I taking a lunchbox to church?”
Me: “No, we’re eating dinner here before.”
The Artist: “I don’t want to go then.”
Me: “What? Wait, why?”
The Artist: “I’ll get hungry.”
Me: “NO, YOU WON’T. I’m feeding you before.”
The Artist: “I’ll still be hungry.”

The Artist: “Knock, knock.”
Kyle: “Who’s there?”
The Artist: “Interrupting Saints.”
Kyle: “Interrupting Saints wh–”
The Artist: “WHO DAT!!!”

(The Engineer earned a trip to Dairy Queen after no accidents all day at school. So after she finished her blizzard, she informed me she needed to go potty. After she did…)
The Engineer: “I potty. I get treat?”

(passing a woman at the doctor’s office with a newborn baby)
The Artist: “That lady is going to have a baby.”
Me: “Shhhhh!”
The Artist: “What? I didn’t say she was OLD.”

And with that, happy birthday to me!!!